It builds character-

God uses the difficult times to produce Christ likeness within us. Refining and sharpening, He is scrapping away the rough edges and revealing His glory in us. The process isn't comfortable and it usually hurts. I'm not opposed to the process- I just wish He could take a break for a bit! It seems that I move from one "refining moment" to another without time to breathe. My mom says, "it all builds character" and I said, "I think I have enough character for now....". God obviously doesn't think so! Yet, during the times that are the most difficult, I can see God's hand moving the most vividly. Maybe that is one of His goals. Taking away the comfort, exposing the weakness and providing opportunity to see HIM clearly.

I've been feeling overwhelmed in recent weeks. The pressures of ministry- of trying to be obedient and wise in decision making- in arranging staff, massaging staff, planning details- have weighed heavy. And the balance- between family, HOPE and youth group frustrates me. Wanting to be "all things" but yet not having the know how to do that. I find it hard to wait on the Lord as He is developing others and producing growth in their lives. I want them to be somewhere where they aren't yet capable of being.

Yet- there has been so much joy in recent weeks. To see people wrestle with convictions and to see them pour into the WORD to discover God's solution. Seeing sin confronted in love and to seeing humility and repentance in response. How GREAT is our God! To hear a teen say, "I'm home" when he returned to youth group after being away for the summer. A call from an unsaved mother, saying youth group was the best thing for her daughter this year! Having six teens sit with you and commit to being godly examples to their peers as members of the leadership council. To hear the innocent prayers of my teens. To get a hug from the boys and know that they truly mean it and that they love us even when we have to correct them. Seeing a new face and the joy he had by coming and feeling comfortable and accepted. The adventure of new friendship- uncovering the layers to reveal the heart. Of feeling so comfortable and the ability to be completely transparent (even to a fault). Being able to laugh at yourself. Having friends who love you and pray you through rough spots. For wise counselors who provide godly counsel even when it is uncomfortable.

It is easy to get overwhelmed and weighed down by the pressures. Yet God is still present- still in control of all things: even the midst of being misunderstood, confused and frustrated.
And the reminder from Ephesians- He can "do immeasurably above all that we ask or thing". The pressures can produce two results: either running from God because of the pain, discomfort and selfishness or running to His open arms for comfort, peace and courage.

I was driving yesterday and heard the following song on the radio:

Over My Head- Brian Littrell

I tried to figure it out
Time and time again and time again
I guess there's just some things I'll never understand
'Cause Your ways aren't our ways
But deep down in my soul, down in my soul
There is one thing I know that I know

I'm in over my head
Right where I wanna be
I'm so lost within Your love
The love that always covers me
So high, so deep, so wide
A strong and cleansing tide
My soul has found a place to rest
I'm in over my head

I've been holding on
Now I'm letting go, just letting go
Gonna let Your love carry me away
I don't know where I'm going
But I'm surrounded by the truth
And I can feel the current pulling me
Deeper into You

I'm in over my head
Right where I wanna be
I'm so lost within Your love
The love that always covers me
So high, so deep, so wide
A strong and cleansing tide
My soul has found a place to rest

I'm in over my head
You see me for who I am
You did reach out Your hand
You made me understand
That Your love has always covered me

Always~
Elisabeth